Using your failures to your advantage

Today I took my first MCAT diagnostic test; and I am actually quite happy with my results. Initially, when I started taking the exam, I felt my heart race as if I were about to run a 100m sprint (this is a major sign of your sympathetic nervous system starting to acknowledge a stressor). Most amateurs, when presented in a first-time situation, may show symptoms of acute stress (like I did). BUT THIS IS GOOD!!! This means that I have so much to learn, not only from a material-learning perspective, but also from a test-taking, strategy perspective as well.

Let’s look at it from a different perspective. Think of something you are really, really good at — maybe some would even consider you a professional. When you first started out, you most likely did not have the skills that you obtained over the course of where and who you are now. The same holds true for test taking. Tests merely show growth. They show preparedness, accuracy, strengths, and weaknesses. Taking this diagnostic test demonstrates, to me, the areas and the details of information I would like to improve, and also from a macro-perspective, it shows what I can do to improve my own mental psyche and apprehension when entering the actual test.

Today, I challenge you to change the way you think about exams or tests. Try and find the positives; and try to find the area or areas where YOU can improve. Practice, practice, practice and eventually with time and more practice, you should be able to reach your goal(s).

xoxo,

calcal

P.S. It is time to take outlast year’s physics!

Have the best 2015 relationship with Life!

So often I find myself thinking about love, life, happiness, what’s next on my plate that I can tackle, and what light I will follow into my next expedition. All of those things are amazing to think about, but sometimes they can make your mind spin out of control. All of the what ifs and wills of this world are great to ponder, but we also have to think about all of the here and the right-now thoughts as well. It is great to have fantasies, but it is equally great to intertwine those fantasies as a part of your reality.

Today was a great day for me — not only because I felt the sun kiss my Philadelphia-cold skin, but also because I was re-inspired to blog my first blog post of 2015! Happy New Year!

Today, I had my first epiphany of 2015.  Like I said before, I often let my mind wander; I let thoughts shift in and out of my frontal cortex as if they were waves crashing into an open sea of blue. Most often times, one wave of positivity leads into the next, but sometimes (as a part of the process of thinking and meta-thinking) those beautiful waves crash into a stormy abyss. AND when a storm comes, it is very hard escape. However, it is important that you find your lifeline or that light in between the rainy clouds. For me, it is reminding myself that these thoughts — both positive and negative — are merely JUST thoughts; and what IS important is what thoughts I allow my mind to translate into words or actions. Think about it, your mind does not stop — not even for a second — throughout the day. Do you remember what you were thinking about at 2:30 pm? No, me neither!

Your mind has a lot to think about, to neurally translate (for example the smells you sniff through your nose, or the touch you feel, or the beautiful sights you see), to remember, to act upon, to share… This is why, in the New Year, it is important to respect your thoughts — both good and bad — but remember that they are merely just thought; and YOU have the ability to speak out or act upon your thoughts.

Today, when I had my deep epiphany, I started to activity think about my thoughts. I thought, I thought about my thoughts, I translated my thoughts, and I interpreted my thoughts. I let my fears and my goals for the New Year resurface. And this is what I came up with, my epiphany:

Why am I searching for an authentic relationship with a somebody, when what I should be searching for is a great relationship with ‘Life?’

Relationships with people come and go. Sadly, we lose family and friends to death, to new days, and to new beginnings. So, for right now, the relationship I should be searching for relentlessly is my one relationship with Life. We have this amazing thing called days, where we are able to live, love, and feel — hopefully happiness more than sadness, but moreover, we are able to feel all of what this world offers to us. And sometimes we get into a relationship with stress or a relationship with days that do not go as planned… AND sometimes we do not get what we want, but the lessons we learn from those days, that I am calling “relationships” are more valuable than those days that went as planned.

As I write this, I am challenging YOU, as your relationship with Life unfolds this year, to create one of the best relationships with “Life.” Instead of looking at life scared, instead of putting up walls to block out the could-be hurt feelings, I challenge you to look deeply at those walls as something useful. Ask yourself what is hindering you from being the best version of yourself today; ask yourself why you have put up those wall; and ask yourself how, this year, you will work on destroying or changing those walls from hindering what could be or who you could be.

I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. Sometimes, we need those jaded experiences, or we need things not to work out because the lessons we learn from those experiences are more powerful than having everything go your way.

As I jump into this new year, I dare you to use what happened yesterday — the stress you felt from getting turned down, the stress you felt from a loss, the sadness you felt from not getting your way the first go-around — as something that will lead you to an even greater future!

Looking at Life this way may help turn those thoughts – both good and bad – into more positive actions and experiences. This 2015, we need to change our outlook: It truly is exciting to be turned down for things because it means WE are that much closer to achieving the things that WILL work out!

Happy New Year and Happy Life!

xoxo,

calcal

Change is good!

Today, I impulsively decided I wanted to cut my hair, but not just a little trim like I normally do. This time, I decided to cut a whole six inches off; and I could not be happier with my semi-impulsive change!

It is important to take care of your health — physical, mental, and emotional. It is equally important to make sure you continue to do things that make you feel your definition of beautiful (this does not always mean keep your physical self up, it also include keeping your emotional, psychological, and mental self up as well). AND sometimes even the littlest changes can help refresh your mental state.

Today I challenge you to make time in your day to do one thing that you love doing that will make you feel your definition of beautiful. It could be going on a long run, reading your favorite book, curling your hair, talking to your bestie, or going on an adventure in the city you live in! Whatever it may be I hope it makes your day a little bit better.

Thankfulness

With the holidays nearing, it is the perfect time to start actively trying to find gratitude in the little parts of your every day that make it equally special. The holidays — no matter what you choose or do not choose to celebrate — is a time, for many, of regrouping with loved ones, reflecting on the previous year, and de-stressing from work deadlines or school finals.

Let’s face it, we all deserve a little break from reality to enjoy and celebrate in all that we are thankful for; and a little break from the ordinary is sometimes all we need to refresh for that New Year! 

Keeping this in mind, as we move towards this break — and for some, as we reach a peak of stress right before it — it is important to keep everything in perspective. One way I have absorbed this mentality is by keeping a gratitude diary (actually for me it is a gratitude wall) where I post-it note the little parts of my everyday experiences that I am thankful to have. For example, today I woke up two minutes before my very loud alarm clock rang, the bane of my existence, and so I had time to click it off. For me, finding things to be thankful for allows me to find the many positives in life — or the many parts of our every day that we forget, choose to dismiss or take for granted. As taught to me by my family, what we choose to see is what we get. If we choose to look at the positives most often we get positive outcomes; and likewise, if we choose to look at the negatives, most often we get negative outcomes. One way to circumvent or trick our minds away from thinking negatively is by remembering to practice gratitude; and thus, gratitude will trick our minds to forge more positive thoughts.

As we know life has many highs and lows, but this mechanism can help move lows into highs much faster (at least this mechanism worked for me)! 

Today, I challenge you to write down parts of your day that your are thankful for — it could be that text that you received from your loved one, it could be that holiday, peppermint mocha from Starbucks, or it could be something as huge as your family. Whatever it is, I hope it helps ease your tension and stress; and I hope it helps make your holidays a little bit more meaningful!

Your inner child!

I DON’T WANT TO GROW UP!

I think one of the reasons why I want to pursue pediatric medicine is because I want to work specifically with children. Children define true and utter happiness — living a life that is pure and honest. One cannot help but to be happy when surrounded by genuinely, happy people. It’s magnetic!

I think we can all learn a little something from our own inner child. Think of your own life before you spent time worrying about all the expectations, the comparisons, the definitions, the setbacks, the negatives, and the many adversities in life… man, was that a sweet life or what? See, the thing is, YOU still have that ability. You still can embrace your inner child and all the good that comes by choosing to live that life. Instead of building a sandcastle, you have the ability to build and create a life that YOU want to live. YOU can choose what you want to do; most of the time, only YOU know what you truly want out of life and the surroundings you wish to pursue to make your life the life that you want to lead. YOU have this amazing energy and YOU have the ability to leave a “positive footprint” in every place you wander into. YOU have the ability to laugh at things you find funny; YOU have the ability to hear or to listen; you have the ability to sing your favorite lyrics at the top of your lungs or dance like no one is watching in a room full of everybodies; and most importantly, YOU have the ability to choose happy. This is your life and you only get one version to lead your feet into the direction of the best life you could possibly live.

Today, I challenge you to dig deep into your past and reflect on how your inner child would live the life you have right now. Befriend someone with less prejudice, walk up to someone and say “hi,” dance, sing, smile, shake off what you think others are thinking about you and do what you want to! Life is too short and too precious! I’m embracing my inner baby-Callan and I hope you find your own inner baby-You too!

Find your passion and pursue it

Have you ever considered how lucky you are to be able to find something you love and to be able to pursue it for the rest of your life? How great would it be if you were able to apply that to all aspects of your life, even things that you previously viewed as boring, unfulfilling, or even a waste of time? YOU can, and YOU will but you MUST do a few things to change how you view your present self first.

First, it is essential to try to change — as hard as it may be —  how you define “failure.” To me, there is no such thing as failure. Yes, situations may not go as planned, but the adversities or the perceived events that once dismayed you will eventually take you where you are supposed to go or be.

Second, everyone, no matter who they are or where they are from, hits multiple forks in their life’s road (a metaphor I use to describe my life, if I may) — many times those same forks or diverges will lead you down an unanticipated or unknown path, one which you did not foresee in your life plan. However, the tools that you pick up along the way provide you with an eclectic array of skills to embody, to make, and to be an even better candidate for the position or shoes you hope to fill or become. So, instead of looking at the current events in your life that are not going as planned, or that task that is hard or unfulfilling, try and see what positive take-aways you can learn in this very, present moment. We need not to forget that there are always positives, always; and sometimes the biggest challenge is not in the challenge itself, but instead, it is the way we think of the challenge or the adversity.

Once, we try to change the way we view the definition of failure and once we re-shape our perception of challenges in a more positive manner, the adversities, the failures, and the challenges we once perceived do not seem much like one at all! Then, at this point, it is important to try to focus and keep yourself in the most present moment as possible. Look for ways to engage in whatever you are doing — be it your schoolwork, your work, your extracurriculars, your free time, your hobbies — and try to have a little fun when doing them! This may mean unplugging from your phone or computer for a little while in hopes of creating a space of complete and utter present-ness.

The final process to find passion in whatever you do, is to act as if whatever you are doing is fun, exhilarating, and positive. For example, when you are studying, act like the information you are learning is fun and great. Think of the information as it enters your brain; think of the metaphysical and neurobiological processes by which that information becomes ingrained in our brains. Think of the new wealth of knowledge we are learning. This goes for all aspects of your life.

The moment you realize that YOU are the one responsible for your own happiness is the moment you realize that YOU can change the way you live your life! Today, I challenge you to look at situations in your past that you viewed as a “failure” and use the tools you have learned in this post to write down skills you have acquired from those “failures.” Remember life is a long road, but ultimately it can also be a fun one and positive one as well!

** I claim no credit for picture; found and compiled from pinterest/tumblr site by an individual artist **

Do not allow yourself to doubt

Do not allow yourself to doubt your abilities. So often, I allow myself to doubt the person I am or the person I will become, but that is not fair to all that I have done and all that I am… and the same goes to YOU as well!!! The moment you allow doubt to enter your mind is the moment that you allow negativity to control your destiny.

Life is about giving yourself options; it is about allowing yourself to try new tasks, test your abilities, find out what you flourish in and improve what you fail in. Life is not just one straight road, but instead it is a mountainous journey of ups and downs, of ins and outs, of curves and stumbles, of peaks and valleys. Those valleys will come, those stumbles will come, those downs will come, and those outs will come. It is a product of life; and it makes all the good parts better and the better parts the best! We have to accept that not everything in our life will go exactly as we want it to, but we can prepare ourselves to take roads we want that will lead us to the destiny we have always wanted. We can also prepare and train ourselves to try our best and accept failure as nothing more than a means to lead us to success.  Failure will occur, it is a product of life, but failing to try or allowing ourselves to feel doubt is no more beneficial than remaining static.

This post is nothing more than a reminder to release self-doubt! Today, I challenge you to write down three things that you have succeeded in; and one thing that has transformed from a failure into something amazing!

Mental health promotes physical health

Mental health, not just physical health, is one of the most important aspects of life that will help you live the life that YOU want to live. It is important to take time to pursue mental growth, mental happiness, and the opportunity to bathe, regenerate, and relax your mind as well! Unlike your body where you can actively take days off  in order to allow your skeletal muscle tissue and cells to regenerate from that hard workout completed the previous day, I contend that you really do not have that ability with your mind. Think about it, when can you just shut off your mind completely? When can you give it that much needed break? Even in your sleep, your mind — and the neural synapse interactions involved to maintain constant allostasis —  is at work either dreaming of the endless possibilities of the yesterdays and the tomorrows or ensuring that your heart keeps pumping, and your lungs and blood are both saturated with oxygen, for example. There really is no time where your mind is not working, in fact it is always thinking, always controlling your bodily functions — maintaining emotional responses and physical health — and it allows you to form new memories, new relationships, and new perspectives.

Your mind is the master controller and it deserves a break; it deserves a time to unplug from the world. It deserves a time to bathe in the purest of waters; and it deserves to be happy. Your brain is filled with all types of neurotransmitters, hormones, free radicals, ions, and molecules to stimulate growth; BUT I contend that your mind is happiest when it is saturated with the optimal levels of the “happy molecules” — the serotonin, the dopamine, the endorphins, the ghrelin, the phenylethamine, even the optimal level of cortisol (and many others). These molecules are all involved in creating the happy feelings we have all felt in our lives — be it through falling in love with someone, something, or some experience.

This post is to remind you to allow yourself to experience a break; allow your mind to saturate itself with those happy molecules. You know your mind the best; you know the activities that help cultivate positivity for your mind to flourish. Today I challenge you to take some time to cultivate your mind — whatever it may be! Surround yourself with people who make you laugh, pick up a new hobby that you have always wanted to try, create a happy playlist and dance in your room, go on a long run, try a yoga class, meditate, read a novel that you have always wanted to, try a food or restaurant that has been on your bucketlist, talk to a therapist about something happy going on in your life, make a list of things you are thankful for… there are so many things that make your mind happy! Go on an do it!

It’s okay to have a “bad” day

We have to remember that not every single day will be the best day of our lives. Some days, no matter how bright the sun shines, we just have to put our shades on and trudge though it. It is perfectly okay to have a “bad” day or many “bad” days at that, but what we have to remember is that WE have the ability to turn those bad days into good days. We have the ability to look through those bad days as days that will help bring new light into our lives — these days provide us with growth and new-found spirit.

If I could help every single person on this planet have consecutively GREAT days, I would, but the truth about life is that no life is perfectly perfect; and some days will be better than others. There will be days where you are sad; there will be days where you are mad; and there will be days that you wish never happened. BUT those days make your good days better and your better days, the best!

The saddest part about life is that there are people — cynical people or negative people or manipulative people — that will do anything and everything in their power to make sure your life is exponentially worse than their life, but let me let you in on a little secret, the only person responsible for listening to them is YOU! Ironically and unfortunately, the happier you become, the more you can attract the wrong listeners. However, simultaneously, the happier you become the stronger your shield is to ward them off. Use your strength to keep persevering; and as hard as it is to push them away, remind yourself how powerful you truly are! Don’t surrender your happy power to them or else you are condoning and placing a precedence of their negative energy over your positive energy.

AND SO WHAT if they make fun of you… life is too short to let the negative minds hold a power over you! The same holds true for those “bad” days that you have, are, or will experience. Don’t let them bleed into the colorful days of the present and the future. Try to remind yourself that there are good parts to your “everyday” and try to hold on to those days and those moments as tightly as possible.

Wishing you the very best to your week, and hoping that you experience as many GREAT moments as possible.

Random Acts of Kindness

It is amazing how one, small outwardly act of kindness can create a cascade of positive responses. Not only does it help transform your own mood, but through it, you can help transfer your own happiness to the world around you. This act is greater than you and me; it creates a more positive community of kinder, more thoughtful individuals.

Today, I challenge you to do something without the intention of receiving “a return.” It can be anything from complimenting a stranger to buying a homeless man dinner. Whatever it is, YOU, as the giver, will feel the richness of what you are offering to the world. For example, today, I sent a care package to a friend who is going through a tough time!

Have some fun with it; be creative!

Here is a month of good deeds you can do or use as a way to spark some other good ideas for the month of October: