The in-between

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The in-between stages can be difficult and challenging, not only for the person going through the process, but also for his/her support team.

Sometimes, the fear of striking out can keep us from playing or re-entering the game. In other words, sometimes the anticipation of what is to come and the fear “failing” one’s own expectation can paralyze us from moving forward. BUT it is in these trying times that we MUST keep treading on.

I can be a testament of this. I am caught in this “in-between” stage — the stage of knowing where I want to be and what I want to be doing in life and yet fearing how and when I will get to that next stage. For me, trusting the process can be hard; and letting fate take hold of what I would rather control is even harder.

However, through this whole process there have been a few strategies that have helped me continue to persevere through my own negative and self-limiting thoughts:

  1.  Make a list of your people, your places, and your past. First, allow yourself to remember those on your team, those who have and will support you through the process no matter what the outcome is. Second, take note and surround yourself in places that provide you with comfort. This place could be your place of worship, it could be a scenic trail along the ocean’s shore, or it could be your local coffee shop surrounded with the smell of sweet pastries and morning coffee. Whatever your place is, make sure it provides you with a sense of tranquility and peace of mind. Third, allow yourself to recall those special moments in your life that have gotten you to the place you are now. We all have ups and we all have downs, but this is your time to remember the special, positive moments that can allow you to bask in the gratitude of life.
  2. Don’t forget to make time for the people and activities that make you feel happy.  If you’re an outgoing individual, do not forget to make time to meet new people or share in relationally-rich activities. If you like serving others, make service an important aspect of your weekly or even daily schedule. If you’re an active individual, do not forget to make time to exercise.
  3. Take time to relax. Remember, your brain and your body are active organs and they need time to rejuvenate and regenerate. Even if it only for a short period of time, allow your body and especially your brain (the primary system of energy depletion) to relax.
  4. Take time to be thankful. Either write in a journal or create an active gratitude wall where you can add new, daily items to your gratitude list. Remember, happiness persists when gratitude exists.
  5. Be easy on yourself. You only have one life to live; why are you going to be your toughest critic? This point is exceptionally hard for me to remember, too. However, when looking outside of your circumstance, humble confidence cannot hurt you. Be nice to yourself and allow yourself to make mistakes, to learn, and to grow.

 

You will accomplish your dream. I believe in you.

 

Believe in yourself,

Cal

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Take a break to perceive all the beauty around you! Visualize your dreams, act them out in your mind, breath in all the perceptions that will take place as your road narrows upon the uphill climb to obtain those dreams.

Your dream may seem distanced and daunting, but no amount of distance and no amount of daunt that you may feel can keep you from achieving something that you were always meant to achieve.

Keep on keepin’ on,

calcal

What are you grateful for today?

How’s your day? What are you thankful for today?

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I hope you have not caught the “Tuesday Bluesdays,” but instead you have boarded the terrific Tuesday train! 

Today, I am reminding you to find gratitude in one (or many) aspect(s) of your day — even the littlest of things, experiences, people, and places. No matter the time of day or the place of trade, one can find gratitude in most all they do, and today is the day to excitedly exclaim it.

You can start by a simple internal “thank you” prayer, which can help you maintain perspective and obtain happiness; OR if you choose, you can also externally applause or thank someone in your life for making an impact (because we all have people who have helped shape us into the person we are today). 

Look deep into your day, and choose to remember the “sweet nothings” or the “sweet everythings,” and inwardly and outwardly express your thankfulness for having these people, places, experiences, or things in your life!

Life is sweet… so “thank” on,

Cal 

Is there some place in your life that you want to be healed?

First, as you are quietly self-reflecting, ask yourself if there is a part in your life that you would like to heal? It can be any part  — the healing of a disease, the healing of the loss of a loved one, the healing of a physical impairment, the healing of an emotional pain, the healing of a relationship…

This is your time to recognize whatever you have decided you no longer want to weigh heavy on your heart. This step is important. Not only does it allow a person to self-reflect and recognize parts of his or her life that he or she would like to feel and see change, but it also allows him to feel human, to feel like he can be a part of something that feels impossible to change.

Whether it is something physical, emotional, mental, or relational, the first step in the healing process starts with the recognition that there is some part or place in your life that may need healing. We all have something that weighs down on our heart and we can be a part in changing and releasing that weight. We as humans all have the power to heal ourselves and others in our lives; we have the power to heal our own insecurities and ailments; and we possess the power to accept that we can do this time and time again.

We all have some part or thing — even those who seem to have it all together — that we can choose to improve.

Today, I challenge YOU to look in the mirror and ask yourself what you would like to see healed! Dig deep and prompt yourself with a question like, “What am I extra-critical of about myself?”

After you have recognized the part of your life that you would like to see healed, write it down and make it known to yourself that you are actively trying to see and feel change. For example, I write my “healing areas” on a green post-it note and stick it on my laptop, where I can see it every day!

The third part in this process is to actively try to do something every day to change whatever it is you would like to improve or heal. In this part of the process it is equally important to note that you are doing your best, and that there may be days where you trip and stumble. Those “bad” days are just as important as the good days because they show you how far you HAVE come since you started!

Lastly, the final part to healing is in “the believing process” that you are healed. You must believe in your change; you must believe that YOU were the one behind that change.

You’re a beautiful person with a beautiful mind and soul!

Xoxo,

Cal

To all twenty-something-year-olds

Dear recent graduates and many others who continue to try to find their way through the tumultuous path we call life,

Life is filled with many ups and many downs, many curves and many long straight roads with no end in sight, many tears and many smiles, a lot of sweat, a lot of falls, many unknowns, and many blind spots, but at the end of each day and in fact during the whole day we have the opportunity learn something new. We have the opportunity to dive deep into the saltiest of waters and once there, we then have the opportunity to sink or tread to a different shore, a new shore, an unexplored shore.

That, that is life.

Now some may say diving into this water is the hardest part — others may say learning to tread — but I contend the most difficult part to all of it, is learning to learn efficiently, learning to be thankful for the position you are in, learning to appreciate the knowledge you have obtained through the process and learning to apply your “here-and-now” knowledge to your future goals or career trajectory.

Some days we may questions our path, we may wonder how we got here or why we took that last turn, or perhaps how this “new” position will get us where we want to be in the future. However, that is not for us to question. We are not here to question the path we took, for that is already in the past. BUT we do have this amazing opportunity to bask in the present and learn. Learning doesn’t just happen in a classroom or by reading a textbook. Learning can happen through meeting new people and partaking in new conversations; learning can take place as we run along the beach or as we talk to our mom on the phone; learning can take place as we taste new foods or hear new sounds.

We can learn every day, and the new, unexplored knowledge we obtain, we can then apply to our life, our path, and form new memories along the way.

This post is to encourage those who are struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel; this post is to reassure those who think they are doing a job that has no purpose — for there is always purpose in whatever you are doing as long as you are working hard to learn from every perception.

Find the love in your today, twenty-something-year old!

Xoxo,

Cal

Thankful Thursday

Today, I challenge you to reach out to three people who have helped shape the person you are today! These three people could be as personal as your mom, dad or best friend or it could someone you barely know like the author of your favorite novel or TV show. No matter what, most every person had a little help along the way; and it is truly amazing to acknowledge and thank those who have helped you achieve your goals!

Write your three a thank-you note and send it their way!

A big thank you to my three!

xoxo,

Cal

Monday Motivation

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Seven things to motivate you this Monday:

1) Remember that today will only be as great as you make it!  Whether you want a mundane or a magical Monday, it is up to you, truly!

2) You only get 52 Mondays every year. Fifty-two…that’s only about 75,000 minutes of Monday each year (and a third of those minutes you will probably spend asleep). So…Why would you approach a Monday with anything less than your smile, your good-vibing energy, and the best beat to your step from your favorite song?

3) Remember that wherever you go, you are imprinting your energy onto others. When you walk into any space — new or old — people around you are vibing off of your energy. One thing I try to do is act like every single day is a chance to leave a good first-impression on the new people I meet or a great n-numbered impression on the people who I have already had the chance to imprint. When you walk into a new space today, act as if it you are on your first date with the person you have had the biggest crush on in your life! hahaha

4) If you had the chance to make someone’s day better would you?  Think about it this way: how many times have you had a “bad” day, and someone else helped turn it around? Well, you could be that person that turns someone else’s day around. It is all up to you and the energy you wish to share with the world.

5) If you had a permanent tattoo on your forehead, what would it say? Would it say happy? Would it say lovable? Would it say genuine? Would it say motivational? We may not have a permanent tattoo printed on our forehead, but we do have energy that acts somewhat like that of a tattoo. Pick your “permanent tattoo” and embody it, be it, and shine it to the world around you!

6) Think of three things that you are looking forward to today. Is it your walk to work or class? Is it seeing your special someone? Is it your lunch with a friend? There are always great parts to every day; find three things today that will help make your day even better!

7) Find something you are thankful for and live for it! Whether you are thankful for your run in the rain, your family, your friends, the school you attend, or the growth you have obtained over the weekend, soak in that thankfulness! Life is so much better when you are thankful for the people, experiences, and things around you! Mantra for this Monday: “happiness exists when gratitude persists.” What are you thankful for today?

Have a happy Monday… I take that back, have a happy everyday! Today, I challenge you to enjoy most every part of your Monday; I challenge you to kick butt and take on this Monday with full force; and I challenge you to walk into every room, every situation, and meet every new or old person with a welcoming and motivating smile! Make the best of your Monday!

xoxo,

Cal

All it takes is one person

Sometimes all it takes is just one person — one person to turn your day around, one person to inspire you, one person to share or pass his or her energy along to you! There are people who just bring out the best in others — people who light up the room just by being in it. My hope is that you are one of those gems because truly you have the ability to be that person each and every day!!!

How many times have you “vibed” off of someone else’s energy (for better or for worse)? Often times we mimic the traits of the people we hang out with repeatedly; and likewise, they mimic our behaviors and quirks as well. Thus, it is important to try and bring your best version most every single day.

Think of a person you admire greatly, what is he or she like? What energy does that person possess and share when you are in the same physical space? Does he or she smile a lot? Does he or she laugh a lot? Is he or she positive? Does he or she speak respectfully of others?

Today, I was inspired by a girl who I have yet to meet, but through each and every correspondence she exudes positivity. It is something that draws me to her; and after speaking with her I am inspired to stay positive. We need more people like that because life is beautiful and we deserve to enjoy the fruits as often as possible.

I hope this post inspires you to be one of those people. Remember, you share your energy with just about every person you meet, talk to, or stand in line with in Starbucks. Be that person in your favorite, candid photo of yourself — laughing, smiling, and simply just being genuinely happy.  10273550_10152821108201959_3112879636312086553_n

Have a beautiful, sunny day; and remember to use your energy to brighten someone’s day today!

xoxo,

cal

On the topic of love

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Love is an important aspect of life.

To many, true love is found between two people, and in the most idyllic form, it will (hopefully) last forever. Like most girls, I too want to believe that love does exist and can exist for an eternity. However, I also believe that before two people can obtain this form of “true,” romantic love, they must experience life on their own individually first. What this means is each person (before diving into romantic love) has articulated his or her individual dreams; and hopefully, he or she has at least tried to achieve them before actively entering romantic love. There is no shame in being single or “alone,” in fact it is sort of rewarding to learn how to be confident enough to master who you are as a person independently of another. That “right” person will walk into your life when you and your heart are ready to open up to him or her, but until then, there is zero shame in trying to make yourself the very best version of who you would like to become.

In moving forward, when you actively start to surround yourself with positive people, attributes, qualities, and things which make you feel better, you intrinsically start to become a more positive and inevitably a better person in the process.

When I look at two individuals who make their relationship “work,” I see two individuals with separate worlds that somehow make their two worlds collide. Moreover, what I mean by this is instead of making someone your whole world, you can make him or her a grand part of your world.  The best of relationships are those who allow their partner to be themselves; they allow their partner to mold and change in a way that they, together, can change in rhythm, but on separate paths.

Love will come. It comes every day, but so often we neglect to see it. It comes in all different forms — romantically, religiously, intrinsically, platonically, materially, unconditionally, gustatorily, in gratitude, and in many other equally important forms.

This post is to remind you that you do not always need a special someone to affirm you are loved, it can start today from within. This message is to remind you and to challenge you to love yourself first, make yourself standout by being positive, by living out your dreams, and then inevitably, you will start to attract quality people who posses the same great attribute as you have been developing.

Keep your head high, and find love in the littlest parts of your day!

Xoxo,

Cal